Manna For Moms

Devotions for Moms Like You!

January 2009

Love Them Now

Megan Breedlove No Comments

I love my kids. I love spending time with them, and I love being a stay-at-home mom.

But sometimes…I find myself wishing.

I wish…he would be more interested in using the potty.

I wish…she would stop deconstructing the house every time I turn around.

I wish…he would stop whining.

I wish…she wouldn’t argue.

I wish…they would let me have an entire phone conversation without interrupting.

I wish…they would eat what I put in front of them—without complaining.

I wish…I wish…I wish…

Do you have wishes, too? Do you, like me, earnestly wish some things about your child or his or her behavior were different? Are you, like me, working very hard in some areas to help bring about the day when the behavior is put aside, or outgrown?

Oh, we think, when she stops doing this, life will be so much easier. Or, if he would just start doing that….

There’s nothing wrong with looking toward the future. In fact, as mothers, we must look toward the future. We need a perspective that says that this too shall pass. We need a perspective that helps us realize what is truly important, and what isn’t. We need an eternal perspective that reminds us of what will be important ten, or twenty, years from now, and what will be forgotten.

But let’s not focus so hard on changing our children’s behavior in the future that we forget to love them in the present.

Yes, our children will probably be a lot easier to deal with once a particular behavior is under control.

But this doesn’t mean our children will be any easier to love in the future.

Easier to get along with? Maybe.

But not easier to love.

You see, if we find it easier to love our children once their behavior changes, it reveals that our love has been performance-based.

Saying we might be able to love our children more at some point in the future, once they begin or cease doing something, is the same thing as saying that our love is based on their performance, not on their intrinsic worth as a marvelous creation of God and our precious child.

What you and I must remember is that love is not simply a feeling of comfort with someone. It is not mere approval. It is not even necessarily warm and fuzzy.

Love is action. It is a choice. It is a choice that can be made in any situation, even right now.

No, I don’t know how your children are behaving. But I do know they deserve your love. Right now. As they are. They need to know that they are loved and accepted, no matter how imperfect they are.

It doesn’t mean you always have to accept their actions, their attitudes, or their words. It means you always accept them.

Aren’t you glad that God didn’t wait until our behavior was perfect before accepting us?

Scripture gives us the incredible truth that God loved us and accepted us completely from the very beginning.

Did he accept our sin? Of course not. But even while we were still sinners, God sent his son Jesus to die for us.

God didn’t wait until we were holy before he extended love, grace, and acceptance to us. He didn’t wait until we had reached some level of perfection. He didn’t even wait until we had stopped doing certain things, or started doing others.

Instead, He loved us from the beginning.

Yes, part of his love means that he disciplines us, just as part of your love for your children means that you will discipline them and try to turn them from ways they shouldn’t go.

But make sure your children know deep in their souls that no matter what they do or fail to do, you love them, and God loves them. Not in the future, but right now.

And not just a little, but with all your might.

After all, God has done the same for you.

Romans 5:8—But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

At Our Own Speed

Megan Breedlove No Comments

I love to read. In fact, I always have. When I was younger, I would become so absorbed in reading that I could sit reading for hours without getting up or changing activities.

My daughter Ellie is like that with computer games. She has certain sites she is allowed to visit and certain games she is allowed to play. She could sit for hours playing games, if allowed to, or maybe all day long.

One day, Ellie was sitting at the computer playing games when it so happened that Jessica needed her diaper changed. As I laid Jessica on the changing table, I remembered that her diaper stacker was empty of diapers. Fortunately, however, I had bought some more, and the box was right outside the bedroom door, which meant that it was in the computer area.

I called out to Ellie and asked her to bring me the package.

“Okay,” Ellie said.

I assumed she was coming, so I removed Jessica’s diaper and cleaned her up. I still didn’t see Ellie, so I called her name and looked in her direction.

Ellie was slowwwwly backing towards the bedroom door, her eyes still fixed on the computer screen.

She was obeying, but at her own speed.

I wanted her to obey me right away. The task I had asked her to do was important, even though it probably seemed like no big deal to her. I needed her to act immediately.

Instead, she took indifferent, slow action.

Friends, that’s the way we obey God sometimes, isn’t it?

At our own speed. Indifferently. Slowly.

Maybe when God gave the command, we responded instantly by saying, “Yes, Lord. I’ll do it.” But we remained caught up in our own interests, and the obedience we gave the Lord was distracted, at best.

Mommy friend, what kind of obedience do you want from your children when you ask them to obey?

Around our house, we have a saying that pertains to the kind of obedience my husband and I expect: “immediately, and with the right attitude”. You probably expect the same thing.

If we as parents believe that we can and should expect that kind of obedience from our children, how much better obedience must we acknowledge that God deserves?

And how much farther short of rendering him proper obedience must we acknowledge that we fall, even than our children fall short of obeying us properly?

Friends, we discipline our children for failing to obey promptly.

Do you realize that God disciplines His children for the same reason?

His ultimate goal is to conform us to the image of His Son Jesus. He knows that it isn’t good for us to determine the speed at which we will obey. We must learn to obey “immediately, and with the right attitude” for two reasons. First, He’s God, and He deserves it, and that should be reason enough. But second, we must learn to obey because it is good for us. If even Jesus learned to obey while here on earth, then why would we ever imagine ourselves to be less in need of learning to do so?

I wanted Ellie to obey me not only because I needed something done, but also because I know that she needs to learn to recognize my requests as more important than what she is doing, and to put them first.

It’s true that sometimes, I will make mistakes, perhaps even erring in how, where, when, or why I require her obedience.

But God never errs. Ever.

We know—you know, I know—that whatever God asks is right and good. Therefore, we should obey immediately, and with the right attitude.

It’s as simple as that.

Simple…but not easy. It’s not always easy to obey. But God even helps us do that. He gives us everything we need to perform that which He requires us to do. If we don’t obey, it isn’t His fault.

It’s ours.

Today, are your eyes fixed on God, waiting for His command? Or are they focused on your own pursuits?

Are you so deeply involved in whatever you’re involved in that it would be amazing if you even managed to hear God’s command, and to respond with a yes, much less to respond in a timely fashion?

Or maybe you hear God just fine. Maybe you know exactly what He’s saying. Maybe you’re just not willing to do it, or you’re too busy to do it, or you don’t care about doing it, so you let your own interests crowd out your obedience.

Oh, friend, if this is your situation, don’t waste another second. Get on your knees right now and ask Him to forgive you. Get things straightened out between you and God. Make sure both of you know Who’s in charge, and that it’s not you.

Then, get up and obey. Immediately, and with the right attitude.

Obedience to God will be far more pleasing to your soul than the pursuit of your own interests could ever be.

John 14:15—If you love me, you will obey what I command.

Sick

Megan Breedlove No Comments

My daughter Lindsey is a cuddlebug. In fact, she always has been. She has always enjoyed close physical contact.

Sometimes, she wants to play. She loves being tossed, flipped, or spun. She loves climbing all over me if I lie down. She loves being tickled or “eaten”, which is when I make growling noises and pretend like I am eating her shoulders, her ears, or her cheeks.

Other times, Lindsey simply enjoys being close. Yesterday, I was sitting on the couch talking to one of the other children, when I realized that Lindsey was sitting right next to me. She had climbed up onto the couch and snuggled against me so easily and quietly that I hadn’t even noticed when she came. We sat like that for awhile, with Kenny later joining us, and it was one of the best parts of my day.

When Lindsey is sick, she seems to feel a special need to cuddle. She wants to be held close as much as possible. The most recent time she was sick, she wanted to lie on me and be cuddled.

Did she want fun and games?

No.

Did she want me to take her somewhere?

No.

Did she want horseplay and tickles?

Definitely not.

She simply wanted to be close to me when she was feeling at her worst.

When a child is sick, her mother’s presence and touch are the most healing therapies in the world. They’re even better than chicken soup. They’re better than 7-Up and crackers. I think they even do more good sometimes than medication (though there are certainly times where medication is necessary).

God designed it that way. He designed the relationship between mother and child in such a way that when the child feels sick, she wants her mommy. And He designed cuddling during times of illness not only to help the child heal, but to strengthen the bond between mother and child.

Do you know something? God designed the relationship between Him and His children—us—to work the same way.

When we feel at our worst, He is the One Who can (and will!) bring us the most comfort. Just as you welcome an ill child into your warm, comforting embrace, so does our Heavenly Father welcome His hurting child into His arms.

Had Lindsey refused my comfort when she was sick, she likely would have gotten better anyway. The difference is that if we refuse our Heavenly Father’s comfort, we may not get entirely better. We may wind up with unresolved pain that lingers long after the onset of the original hurt—sometimes years.

So why don’t we seek His comfort?

It could be that we’re afraid to face the pain, and we don’t realize that the pain will hurt worse apart from the Father.

It could be that we blame our Father for the fact that we hurt in the first place, and we let our anger keep us far from His comfort, when what we don’t realize is that with Him or without Him, the hurt would have happened, and what makes the most sense is for us to ask Him to comfort us through it.

Or, it could be that we anticipate a negative reaction when we come to him. Sometimes, we get this idea that we as Christians aren’t really supposed to hurt. We’re supposed to be able to bear everything with a smile on our face. If we can’t, we reason, it must mean we don’t have enough faith. So we don’t come to God for comfort because we can’t come “correctly”—that is, having handled the problem on our own first, in order to show Him…what?

Friend, if this is what you’re afraid of, then you’re misunderstanding God’s very nature.

When Lindsey was sick and came to me for comfort, I didn’t lecture her on how she should act when she is sick. I didn’t tell her that she was being a wimp and send her off to get better by herself. I didn’t even give her any reassurances on how she would get better eventually.

I simply held her and loved her.

If we can be so loving toward our children, and God is so vastly more loving than we are, why would we ever think we would receive anything less than a perfectly loving welcome? If we know how to comfort our children when they are sick, why would we think God wouldn’t comfort us in the way we need?

Oh, friend, how do you need comfort from God today?

I don’t know what is happening in your life. I don’t know the ways you might be hurting.

But I do know that God knows, and that He cares more about you than you could ever imagine.

Let Him comfort you. Climb up into His lap, and lay your head on His chest. Feel His everlasting arms around you as He simply loves you through your hurt with the nearness of His presence.

Matthew 7:11—If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!

Luke 13:34—How often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, but you were not willing!

Not Very Much

Megan Breedlove No Comments

One particular Christmas when I was about ten years old, I had my heart set on getting a camera. It was one of those cameras where you bought flash cubes to click into place on top of the camera and filled it with a C-110 film cartridge. No batteries were necessary, because nobody’s camera took batteries back then. Everybody’s was manual. You would stick your film cartridge in, close the door, and wind it up. If you needed a flash, you would stick the flash cube (some had flash bars) into a spot on top of the camera. If you didn’t want a flash, you left the flash cube off.

I wanted a camera so badly that I made sure Mom knew all about it. I wanted there to be no mistaking the fact that I wanted this camera. I just knew she would get it for me if she knew how badly I wanted it. So I told her—plenty of times, I’m sure—and then waited for Christmas to arrive.

Christmas morning finally came, and we sat around the Christmas tree in my grandparents’ living room, opening Christmas presents. I had opened all but one, and still, no camera.

It must be in the last box, I reasoned. It had to be. I had to have that camera.

I unwrapped the last box and beheld the back of a package. It said “MagiCubes.”

At the time, I didn’t know that that’s what the flash cubes were called. All I knew was that I had opened the very last package, and instead of the coveted camera, Mom had gotten me something called MagiCubes, which I didn’t even know what it was.

I still remember that moment of shock when I realized that I hadn’t gotten a camera. There was a numb disbelief as I mechanically turned the package over and pulled some more of the wrapping paper off.

Then, I saw the camera.

Relief and joy flooded my heart. I had gotten my camera! Mom hadn’t disappointed me after all!

It’s okay to be ecstatic over a Christmas gift. But here’s the point: that camera was not the only gift I received that Christmas. I had gotten many other nice things, chosen for me with love. Yet when I opened that last package and thought I hadn’t gotten the one thing I really wanted, all those other gifts didn’t matter to me.

Yes, I appreciated them. Yes, I was thankful for them. But the abundance I already had still wasn’t enough to keep me from being devastated over what I thought I hadn’t gotten.

I’m sorry to say that I’ve reacted the same way in regard to gifts from God. I suspect that you have, too.

Most of us have plenty of material things. Even if we don’t have as much as our neighbors, we have plenty. Yet often, we spend more of our time and emotional energy focusing on what we don’t have than on what we do have.

Do we sometimes get so obsessed with what we want that we won’t appreciate anything else? Do we decide that anything different from what we want is lesser? Do we take for granted the myriad blessings God has poured out upon us, both spiritually and materially, and focus on the one thing we haven’t gotten that we want?

What is it that you want today?

Maybe it’s a house in a better neighborhood. Maybe you want your children to behave better. Maybe you want applause or recognition.

What if you never get it? What if, in His infinite wisdom, God decides not to give it to you? What then?

Will you look around at what you have, and say, “I already have so much more than I deserve. It’s okay if I never get (whatever your desire is)”? Or will you not even bother looking around at what you have, because what you have doesn’t mean much compared to the absence of what you want?

Maybe you—maybe I—need to start thanking God for what you do have instead of wishing for what we don’t.

Philippians 4:11-12—I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.

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