Gooooooooooal!

I can’t wait for the London 2012 Olympics to start. There’s nothing better than watching together with my children as athletes from more than 200 countries give it their all, competing against each other for the gold medal. There’s not much that makes me feel more patriotic than seeing an American athlete standing on the top step of the podium, wearing a gold medal, hand over his or her heart, listening to The Star-Spangled Banner being played for millions of people to hear. (And not much cuter than seeing my kids stand on the coffee table in the same posture, knowing by identification with the athletes that they’re winners, too.)

Olympic athletes all have a goal: to be the best. They spend years of their lives and thousands of hours (not to mention dollars) pouring themselves into their sport. Everything, from what they eat to when they sleep to how they fix their hair is designed to enhance their performance.

In other words, no one becomes an Olympic champion by accident. Each athlete knows what goal he or she is pursuing. No one stands atop the podium as a result of consistently trying to avoid training, and not a single person has a gold medal placed around his or her neck as a reward for hating sports and spending eight hours a day sitting in front of the TV.

If you want to become the Olympic champion—or the champion at anything else—you have to constantly, consistently hold that goal up in front of you and pursue it. Anything less won’t get you there.

Too bad more of us (myself included) don’t care much about being champions at serving others. We don’t even desire the goal. When we’re called to serve, we often resent it, unless somehow the service seems like fun. We certainly don’t spend hours a day practicing it. We’re usually willing to serve (albeit reluctantly) when service is thrust upon us, but we sure don’t hold up “being a good servant” as a goal in front of us constantly and consistently. We don’t want to be the Olympic champion of servers. We want to spend those eight hours a day on the couch watching TV. We want to eat what we want, sleep when we want, and do our hair how we want. We see no reason to discipline ourselves to reach a certain goal when the goal doesn’t really matter to us.

We see being a servant as an obligation to discharge, not a worthy goal to pursue. We’ll do it because Jesus said it, so we know we’re supposed to. But we don’t really want to.

What difference it would make in my life and yours if we were to decide that being a servant is a worthwhile goal and actually desire to pursue it? If we were to start each day by saying, Today, being a successful servant (one who has, in fact, served) is my goal?

I’m not suggesting that it is never appropriate to rest and relax. There are clear examples in the Bible of Jesus resting and instructing His disciples to do the same. But what was the purpose of His life? Was it to enjoy those times of resting? No. In His own words, His purpose was “not to be served, but to serve.”

Jesus dedicated His entire life to service and commanded us to do the same. He didn’t say, “Serve when you have to and hide your resentment that service interrupted you from other activities.” No, He said to do all things with an attitude of love. I’m pretty sure He meant a positive, willing attitude, as well.

Then He left it up to us to decide whether or not we’ll enter training for the life track He has laid out for us. Are we willing to devote ourselves to what He said should be our goal in life, pursuing that goal with everything that’s in us? Or will we resent the demands placed upon us in training for something we don’t care much about being good at?

I hope and pray for all of us that it’s the former. Because in terms of being a servant, we all have the ability to be the Olympic champion. In the arena of serving, millions of people reach the goal, because you get there not by defeating someone else, but by being fully obedient. One day, Jesus Himself can place the gold medal around our neck and say, “Well done, good and faithful servant.”

Will you and I stand on top of the podium to hear him say that, or will we be at home on the couch watching the ceremony on TV, because we never trained?

Mark 10:45—“For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.”

Coming Alongside

Last week, I wrote about our most recent visit to Chuck E. Cheese and about how someone stole Kenny’s tokens, despite the safety precautions he took. I shared Kenny’s grief with you, and I reminded all of us that there are times we simply can’t blame ourselves for what happened to us—times God doesn’t blame us, either.

This week, I want us to look more closely at something I didn’t even mention last week, because it deserved a whole week by itself. It’s a simple yet profound lesson. If we can fully grasp it and put it into practice, we will display both the character of God and the character He desires from His Church. And that, my friends, is what we were made to do. So let’s look right now at the role three-year-old Jessica played in what happened at Chuck E.’s.

When Kenny walked up to me crying over the theft of his tickets and tokens, and I began to assess what I could do to comfort him, Jessica had something to tell me. “Mommy, I gave him some of my tickets,” she said solemnly.

“Sweetie, that’s really nice of you,” I said.

“I don’t mind,” she said matter-of-factly.

That, right there, is the lesson. Jessica saw her brother in pain, and she comforted him the best she could: by giving him some of her tickets to make up for what he’d lost. She saw him hurting, so she gave, even at cost to herself. And she didn’t mind.

That’s what coming alongside someone is all about. It’s seeing someone in pain and doing our best to comfort her. Period. It’s as simple as that. Yet too often, we decide the cost of coming alongside someone is too great, so we do nothing. Or we assume someone else is going to do something, so we do nothing. Or maybe we’re just selfish, so we do nothing.

I’m not suggesting that each of us is supposed to meet every need we’re aware of. That’s just not possible. But we’ve all been in a situation when God prompts our hearts to give. “Come alongside that person,” He says. “Give.” When He says that, we have a choice. Will we obey?

Giving isn’t always going to involve money. It won’t even always involve material things. But it will often involve something that’s even more precious to us—our time. When the Spirit prompts us, will we be willing to sacrifice our time to come alongside someone? Will we give of our emotions in order to support someone?

God certainly did. He gave His Son Jesus, and in so doing, He gave Himself. Then, when Jesus returned to heaven, the Father gave His Spirit. He is no disinterested God who sits in heaven watching us crawl around down here like little ants. No, He is a loving Father who sees us hurting and gives of Himself to make us feel better.

I pray that God makes us discerning, so that we will know when it’s His will for us to step into a situation. I pray that when it is His will, that He’ll make us obedient. May we always be willing to minister whenever God gives the word, no matter what it might cost us. And in so doing, may we show a watching world the kind of relationship God wants to have with them—coming into their lives not to condemn, but that they might be saved, and loved, and encouraged through Him.

Luke 10:33-34—But a Samaritan, as he journeyed, came to where he was, and when he saw him, he had compassion. He went to him and bound up his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he set him on his own animal and brought him to an inn and took care of him.

Stolen

A few days ago, my husband and I took the kids to Chuck E. Cheese for dinner. We had some coupons and some free time, and we figured, Why not? Of course, when we told the kids, all four mouths dropped open, and for a moment, there was no sound, as if the air had been sucked from the room. Then…”Yay!” they screeched repeatedly, dancing around in joy.

We got there, staked out a table, and waited for out pizza to arrive. That is, I waited. The kids went off to play games, with Phil helping Jessica. I reminded Kenny to keep close track of his cup of game tokens, since the last time we were there, he had set his down and forgotten where he put it. And then, of course, it got stolen.

After supper, we all went back to playing games. Phil and I circulated among the kids, making sure everyone was having a good time and finding games at his or her level. Then I heard it. Kenny was crying.

I turned and saw Phil and Kenny walking towards me. Kenny’s eyes were red, and tears streamed from them and wet his cheeks. He tried to explain to me what happened, but I couldn’t understand him. Phil told me that Kenny had been playing Skeeball and set his cup down by his feet while he played. When he finished his game and tried to pick up his cup…it was gone, along with the couple remaining tokens and all his tickets. “Some kid stole it,” Phil said.

“Mommy, I’m sorry,” Kenny cried, grief flowing from his eyes.

“Oh, son,” I said, stooping down beside him. “I’m so sorry that happened to you. How many tickets did you have?”

“Forty-nine,” he said. His little shoulders shook as he tried to gain control of his tears.

“Then here’s what we’ll do,” I said. “I’ll give you two quarters. That will be good for fifty tickets. That will make up for what you lost. I’m so sorry.”

Ultimately, Kenny was able to choose some prizes he really wanted, and he was happy. But my heart still hurts for him. He was doing the best he could to take care of his tickets, and they got stolen from him. Some other greedy kid, who didn’t care at all about my son, his feelings, or doing the right thing, stole my son’s tickets and wounded his heart.

What hurts me the most in remembering this incident are two things. First, remembering Kenny’s big, brown eyes filled with tears, and seeing his precious face so sad. Somebody hurt my beloved son, and in that moment, I was ready to track that child down and take care of business. If I had known what the child looked like, I surely would have done so.

I wonder how it feels for God, who has the power to avenge any offenses against me, to have to hold back His hand sometimes. If I had been able to, I would have done something about the offense committed against my son. There’s no way in the world I would have let it go. Standing by and allowing my son to suffer when it was in my power to do something about it would have just about killed me. I wonder, then, how God feels when it is in His power to do something, and He has to restrain Himself in accordance with His greater purposes? I wonder how He feels when His greater purposes call for allowing us to suffer rather than making everything right right now.

The second thing that hurts my heart is the fact that Kenny apologized to me. He was afraid he might have done something wrong in “allowing” his tokens and tickets to be stolen. He had been as careful as he could be. His actions were reasonable. Yet he was afraid that somehow, it was his fault, and he thought he better apologize in case I thought he had done something wrong.

Likewise, we are often afraid that somehow what happened to us is our fault. Even when it doesn’t involve any sin on our part, and even when we were being careful, we’re afraid that we did something wrong in failing to prevent it from happening.

Precious mom, there are some things that simply cannot be prevented. Just because something happens to us doesn’t necessarily mean it was our fault somehow. And it sure doesn’t mean God is going to be mad at us for not preventing it. Sometimes, tragedy happens. Sometimes, we’re victims. Sometimes, there was no way to foresee or prevent what happened—at least not by employing ordinary standards of care. There was no good reason for Kenny to feel that he should have prevented what happened, and I told him so. “It wasn’t your fault,” I said. “You were being careful, just like I told you. It wasn’t your fault someone decided to sin and take your cup. And you can be sure that God sees what happened. He knows it wasn’t your fault, and He knows whose fault it was. And He’s not happy this happened to you, either.”

My words seemed to help Kenny somewhat. Gradually, the tears went away, and a smile returned to his face. By the time we got into the van to go home, he was happily playing with his new toys and candy.

But the lessons remain with me: that sometimes, what happens to me is not my fault. And that when someone sins against me, God is not pleased. He’s not going to blame me for someone else’s sin; that person will indeed answer for it one day. Instead, He’ll hug me and tell me He’s sad with me about what happened. And in the moment of my grief, that’s what I want to here: that He’s there, and He cares.

There’s one more lesson I learned from this incident, however, and it, too, is important. This week was about God’s response when tragedy strikes; next week will be about the response we should show others when they’re hurt. I’ll see you next week for a precious lesson in coming alongside others when they’re in pain.

Matthew 25:40—”The King will reply, ‘I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.’”

Servants

One of our kids’ chores is to fold their own laundry. My husband (who usually does the laundry) takes their clothes to their room and tells them to sort and fold. One particular day, he delivered the girls’ clothes to their room and told them to get started. All three girls set to work.

As he was leaving the room, he heard Lindsey say thoughtfully to Ellie, “Boy, it’s like we’re servants or something.”

Exactly. They are indeed servants. That’s what we’re trying to train them to be, because God’s instructions for the home are that we all serve each other. We are a team, and we should each do our part to make the household work. Even Jesus Himself came not to be served but to serve.

So being a servant is not necessarily a bad thing. In fact, it’s often a really good thing. The only problem is…it’s not always fun.

As moms, we’re well aware that one of the primary focuses of our life is to serve our family. Sometimes, serving is easy—like the other day when my kids tasted the meal I set in front of them and said, “Wow! I give this stuff an A+!” Other times, it’s difficult—like last night when one of my children woke me from a deep sleep to say, “Mommy, I had an accident in my bed.”

My attitude toward serving my family tends to vary according to the circumstances. Yours probably does, too. Sure, we’d always acknowledge that being a servant is important, and maybe even that it’s a good idea, or even a high calling. But what do we do when service doesn’t feel like much except drudgery or being unappreciated?

During those times, we can—and should!—remind ourselves that ultimately, we are not serving our family, but the Lord. He is the One who takes our service personally (see Matthew 25:40). But an interesting point arises in that, in the original Greek, the word usually translated “servant” is more properly rendered “slave”. We are Christ’s slaves.

What does it mean to be a slave of Christ? It means that we serve completely at the Master’s pleasure. It means we’re obligated to continue in service and can’t just walk away at any time we might choose. It means our purpose in life is to carry out His wishes and His will, and to advance His interests upon this earth. It means we don’t get to grumble and complain when the service is not to our liking.

Those are the obligations. But being Christ’s slave also comes with incredible benefits. First, it means we belong totally to Him. We belong! We never have to feel unwanted or unloved, because Christ paid an incredible price to buy us. Second, we are set apart to Him and free from the dictates of any other master. Even the one who wants to master us and ruin our lives (Satan) can’t do it, because we’re not his anymore. We’re now owned by God, and not subject to anyone else’s control. Third, we have a purpose in life. Yes, our purpose is to carry out the wishes of another, but don’t miss the incredible point that in carrying out His wishes, we are also doing what’s best for ourselves. Our purpose now is not to serve the one who wants to destroy us, but to spend our lives glorifying our new Master and thus filling our lives with incredible joy.

So yes, there are obligations. Yes, there are times when the Master will call upon us for service and we won’t want to do what He requires. But maybe it would encourage our spirit be more willing if we remembered that anything He asks us to do will also benefit us. What a gracious and benevolent Master we serve! He bought us from a life that would surely have destroyed us in order to give us a life that will never end. Eternal life. Eternal joy.

Sounds like a pretty good return for a mere few years of service, doesn’t it?

John 10:10—“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.”

1 Corinthians 7:22—For he who was a slave when he was called by the Lord is the Lord’s freedman; similarly, he who was a free man when he was called is Christ’s slave.

Stop Provoking

Okay, I admit it: my kids…sometimes…provoke each other. Generally speaking, they get along well, but there are those times when they pester their siblings, either accidentally or on purpose. When it’s an accident, all it requires from me is that I point out to the offender how the other person doesn’t appreciate what the offender is doing. It’s relatively easy to deal with. But when it’s on purpose? Well, that can be a little more tricky to deal with (as in, to help defuse the situation before the offended party strikes back).

Yes, children should refrain from shouting at or pushing their siblings. But it’s a lot harder for them to do the right thing when they’ve been provoked.

It makes sense. After all, it’s hard for me to do the right thing when I’ve been provoked, and I’m an adult. No wonder it’s hard for children.

That’s why God gave parents a very important and specific command: “[Parents], do not provoke your children to anger.” He knows it’s a lot harder for anyone, much less a little child, to obey when someone provokes them. He wants us to do everything we can to help our kids obey, not to make it harder on them.

What are some of the ways we make it harder on our kids to do the right thing? One way is by not making it clear what the “right thing” is. Kids don’t have a lot of life experience, and that means they don’t understand everything they’re supposed to do. When we fail to explain to them how they can learn to be the right kind of person at this particular stage in their lives, we set them up for doing the wrong thing.

Another way we provoke our children is by requiring that they succeed at something that is beyond their developmental level. Telling a two-year-old to clean her room and then getting mad when she doesn’t do a very good job is not only silly, but also hurtful and frustrating to our child. When we consistently frustrate our children in their efforts at obedience, we make it much harder for them to obey with a willing spirit.

Perhaps the most hurtful way we provoke our children is by wounding their little spirits. Harsh or even cruel treatment, unfairness, unkind words, insults, demanding “What’s wrong with you??”—all of these things wound our child’s soul. It’s hard to honor someone who consistently wounds you, and when our attitudes, words, and actions provoke our child to anger, we make it difficult, if not almost impossible, for our child to fulfill his or her second-greatest responsibility (honoring God is the first).

God knows that our children need our help in order to obey. He knows we need to be by turns gentle and firm, but always loving. So He commanded us to avoid being the kind of parent who will make it difficult for a child. Instead, we should be the kind of mom who makes it easy on her kids. Not by letting our children do whatever they want, but by being the kind of parent God is.

You see, God makes it as easy as possible for us to obey. He tells us clearly what is expected of us. He never expects more than He knows we are capable of doing. And He is never harsh and unloving with us. Instead, He pours out His love upon us every second of every day, even if we don’t always see it. Who could be easier to obey than a God like that?

Think about it, mom. Do you make it easy for your children to obey you? Do you make your expectations clear and developmentally appropriate? Do you then treat them with love, even when they mess up? Do you pour your love out upon them each and every day? Precious mom, no earthly person is easier to obey than a mom like that.

Yes, our children will still disobey sometimes, no matter how well we may parent. They’re sinners, just like we are. But we can make obedience a whole lot more likely—and much more pleasant for them to engage in—if we don’t provoke them, but instead show them guidance and treat them with understanding and love.

Ephesians 6:4 (CJB)—Fathers, don’t irritate your children and make them resentful; instead, raise them with the Lord’s kind of discipline and guidance.

Is God Real?

Sometimes young children can come up with the most profound questions about God. For example, the other day, my husband was in the kitchen when five-year-old Lindsey came into the room. “Daddy, Jessica says God isn’t real,” she said.

“Yes, He’s real,” Phil said.

Lindsey turned and ran back into the living room. A few seconds later, Jessica came into the kitchen. “Daddy, is God weal?” she asked.

Fortunately, my husband realized what Jessica was really asking. She knew that God was real—we’ve taught her that—but she wanted to know how that can be the case when you can’t see or touch Him.

Phil pulled a quarter out of his pocket. “Is this quarter real?” he asked her.

She nodded. “How do you know?” he asked.

“Because it’s gway,” she said.

“Can you see it?” he asked.

Again she nodded. This time, Phil folded his hand closed around the quarter. “Now can you see it?”

“No,” she said.

“But is it still real?”

“Yeah,” she said, grinning as if to say that the question was silly.

My husband went on to make the point that just because we can’t see or touch God doesn’t mean He’s not real. I love the illustration he used. In fact, I bet God loved it too. Why? Because it’s the same illustration He used in teaching us about Himself.

God was real long before we became aware of Him (just as the quarter was real before Jessica knew about it). But God knew we needed to see Him. So He sent His Son Jesus. And in seeing Jesus, we saw the Father. But then, He went away for a little while (after His ascension), and we could no longer see Him. In fact, He told His disciples repeatedly that this was exactly what was going to happen—that they would see Him for a little while, but then no longer. Now, He sits at the right hand of the Father, until such time as the Father will send Him to earth to claim those who are His.

Is He still real, even now that we can’t see Him and touch Him? Of course He is. His reality is not determined by our limited, human sight.

But one day, our faith will become sight. One day, the Father will command the Son, “Go!” And the heavens will open, and Jesus will descend, just as He promised. Oh, make no mistake about it. He’s real. On that day, what we now know by faith, we will then know by sight. The Father will open His hand, and we’ll see Jesus. And we’ll know He was there all along.

1 Corinthians 13:12—For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.

Too Far

Recently my youngest daughter, 3-year-old Jessica, stuck a small rock up her nose. I mean, wayyyyy up. The first thing I knew about it was when I suddenly heard Jessica screaming in the living room as if something was actually wrong (as opposed to that I-just-want-attention cry). I sent Ellie to check on her. Within seconds, Ellie returned, saying, “Jessica has a rock in her nose.”

A rock? I thought as I got up to go check. And then I remembered the small, nostril-sized pebbles Lindsey had found in the driveway. She thought they were cute, so she brought them into the house and set them on the coffee table. Sure enough, Jessica was standing right next to the rock collection (which was now minus one rock), wailing.

“I got a wock in my dose!” she wailed.

The rock was so far up there that I couldn’t even see it. I tried to suck it out with one of those bulb-syringes they give you in the hospital when your baby is born, but even its titanic force couldn’t dislodge the offender. It turned out we had to take her to the doctor. “I pushed it too far up there,” she told him sadly. The doctor fished it mostly out with a long metal rod that had a tiny spoon on the end. He then told her to blow (which we didn’t know she knew how to do), and the rock shot across the room. He then cleaned it off and taped it to her chart.

Problem solved. And yes, when Jessica is old enough to appreciate it, we will probably tease her with this story. But we won’t make fun of her. And there’s a big difference.

When both parties get to laugh about it, that’s teasing. When only one person thinks it’s funny, and the other person is made to feel bad about herself, that’s making fun of her. And that’s what we’ll never do.

Why? Because it’s unkind. Because when you make someone feel bad about herself, you wound her soul. And because God never makes fun of us.

Yes, He sometimes reminds us of what we’ve done for the purpose of convicting us. He may even tease us with it—and it’s tons of fun to be teased by God, because the humor is always appropriate. But He never brings up our past sins or mistakes just for the purpose of making us feel a little worse about ourselves. In fact, the Bible tells us that He removes our sins from us as far as the east is from the west—in other words, to a place from which they can never accuse us again. He knows very well what we’ve done, but He doesn’t keep rubbing our faces in it. No, when He forgives, He forgives completely and will never again bring up the incident in order to hurt us.

People might do that. Sometimes, people deliberately resurrect past sins in order to cause us guilt or pain. Not God. When He says they’re gone, they’re gone. You know that thing you did, that no one knows about? Or the thing you did that everyone knows about? If you’ve repented and asked God to forgive you, those things are gone.

An old song says, “Buried in the deepest sea, yes that’s good enough for me. I shall live eternally—praise God! My sins are gone!” And that’s why God did what He did in removing our sins from us—so we can live. We who were once dead in sin can now live. And we can live not with God constantly dangling our past sins in front of our faces, but freely and fully. They’re gone. They’re really gone.

Praise God!

Psalm 103:12—As far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.

John 5:24—“I tell you the truth, whoever hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life and will not be condemned; [she] has crossed over from death to life.”

Ephesians 2:4, 5—But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved.

Serving

Right now, I have a lot of sympathy for Mary the mother of Jesus. I’m almost 8 weeks pregnant, and I feel crummy. In fact, I feel bad almost all day, every day. My first four pregnancies were easy; this one isn’t. And so, as I struggle with bloating and nausea, lack of sleep, dizziness, and fatigue, I sympathize with Mary.

She must have felt some of those same symptoms too. It’s possible that she had a nearly symptom-free pregnancy, but the odds are that she didn’t. At this stage of her pregnancy, she probably suffered from morning sickness, or fatigue, or something. Maybe even all of the above. Maybe she, too, felt like weeping when she was trying to replace the toilet paper roll and dropped it on the floor. Or maybe she simply wept at the shame she endured from bearing the scorn of her community, though she knew she’d done nothing wrong.

For nine months, she suffered—and then, of course, there was that donkey ride to Jerusalem that couldn’t have been comfortable under the best of circumstances and may even have caused her to go into labor. Somehow, riding in a car to the hospital to give birth seems a lot easier than riding on a donkey to a stable.

I think about what Mary endured during her pregnancy, and I identify with her. She seems more real to me. Yes, she was a woman of God chosen by God for the special purpose of bearing the Messiah—unlike me. Yet she was also a pregnant woman, so I know how she felt.

I wonder if one of the things that helped her make it through those long 9 months was knowing that she would bear a Son who would be Savior of His people. She was doing something incredible for the Lord Himself—something no one else could have done in quite the same way.

It comforts me to know that I, too, am serving the Lord through my pregnancy. So did you, through yours, or through everything you suffered on the road to adoption. No, we’re not called to bear the Messiah. But we’re called to suffer for Him just the same.

What I mean is this: Jesus said that whatever we do for “the least of these”, we do directly “for Him.” And who could be more “least of these” than a baby who’s barely the length of a blueberry? Than a baby who doesn’t even have fingers and toes yet, or even true arms and legs? Who could be more “least”?

So when you spend the morning, or even the whole day, throwing up…when you don’t have the energy to do even the things you want to do…when you feel bloated, or your head hurts, or your back hurts, or everything hurts, remember that you are serving your Lord. You are sacrificing your comfort to bring His precious creation into the world. Your suffering is more than something to be gotten through as quickly as possible (though we all wish for that). It’s service to Jesus.

When you went through those things in the past…when you suffered the pains of the adoption process…you were serving Jesus.

Mary served her son and Lord in a very real, tangible way. You and I are serving Him just as directly. That’s because Jesus granted dignity to our suffering by saying that when we serve “the least of these”, we serve Him. In other words, He takes our service personally.

So be encouraged, dear mom. Even your suffering is an act of service. Not only that, but it can be an act of worship, too, if you offer it to the Lord. Lying on the couch, too drained and exhausted to get up because you’re pregnant doesn’t mean you’re doing nothing. Oh, how Satan would love to have us believe that it’s nothing. But Jesus tells us otherwise. We’re doing something.

We’re serving Him.

Matthew 25:40—“The King will reply, ‘I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.’”

Me!

My three-year-old daughter Jessica loves to help around the house. She takes pride in being a “good helper”, and whenever she’s asked to do something, she trots off importantly to accomplish the task. Upon being told she’s done a good job, she beams with pleasure.

I knew Jessica was convinced that she is a good “cweaner”, a good mopper, and a good cook. But I didn’t know she was also a…well, let me tell you the story.

The other day, my husband was preparing homemade strawberry topping for the homemade shortcake I had made. “Can I help?” Jessica asked.

“She’s a good helper,” I affirmed to my husband, not because he didn’t know, but so Jessica could hear me say it.

“I have to slice the strawberries with a sharp knife, so that’s something Daddy has to do himself,” he said. “Then I just have to macerate them.”

“I’m a good macewator!” Jessica shouted happily.

I’m sure she had no more idea what the word meant than I did (apparently, it means letting the berries sit in sugar until the juices come out). But that didn’t stop her. She just knew she was a good…whatever it was.

It’s kind of like a point Robert Fulghum made in his book All I Really Need to Know, I Learned in Kindergarten. He talked about how if you ask a class of kindergarteners, “Who’s a good (singer/artist/runner)?” they will all shoot their hands into the air and shout, “Me!” But ask that same group of people twenty years later, and few of them will say, “Yep, I’m good.”

Why is that? It’s because kindergarteners haven’t yet learned to compare themselves to others and find themselves inferior. They haven’t fully grasped the idea that “some are better than others” and that they might be part of the “others”. As adults, we know it full well, and we’ve categorized ourselves with the “some” or the “others” depending on the category.

Many of those kindergarten girls might dream of being ballerinas. Many of the boys probably dream about being sports stars. But those same kids twenty years later no longer have those same dreams. They “know” they can’t do it, so they don’t want to try.

Sometimes, this isn’t a problem. After all, we have to be realistic. For example, I’m 5’4” and female. I will never play for the NBA no matter how hard I practice, so I might as well admit it now. The problem comes in when we categorize ourselves wrongly (an “other” when we should be a “some”, or vice versa), or when we let our “otherness” cause us to feel bad about ourselves. Worse yet is when we let our perceived “otherness” cause us to believe we can’t do something God has called us to do, or when we lose the desire to try because we believe we can’t be the perfect “some”.

Instead of being a really great “some”, even if not the very best one, we wind up being, in terms of our service,…nothing. Instead of being an average “some”, but one whom God has called, we are…nothing.

Moses would understand how we feel. When God met him at the burning bush and called him to lead his people out of Egypt, Moses made excuses. “They’re not going to listen to me,” he said.

“Okay,” God said, “tell them My Name. Then they will listen.”

“Maybe,” Moses said. “But what if they still don’t believe me?”

“All right,” God said, “I’ll teach you how to perform miracles that will validate your credibility in their eyes.”

“But I can’t speak very well,” Moses protested.

“Who do you think made your mouth?” God demanded. “And if I say you can do it, you can do it already! Now go! I’ll even help you!”

“Aw, come on, please pick somebody else,” Moses begged.

“Moses, you blew it!” God said. “I’ll pick your brother, all right, but you just missed out on a huge blessing.”

Obviously, I have paraphrased this story, but don’t miss the point: Moses didn’t want to do the job because he was afraid he wouldn’t succeed.

How often are you and I tempted to do the same thing—to let somebody else do the job because we don’t want to fail? Granted, nobody likes failure, but why in the world would we think we’d fail if God has called us to do it? Do we not believe that He will enable us to do that which He’s commanded us to do?

No, we don’t. Or at least, not always. We’re more concerned with how we will feel if we fail or how we will look to others (which gets back to how we will feel) than we are with God’s greatness and complete ability. We’d rather miss out on a few blessings than take a chance on looking foolish to others. In other words, we care more about what others think of us than what God thinks of us. And what do you think God thinks of us in that situation? Sure, He still loves us. He always will. But I bet He thinks something like There’s my beloved child who just won’t trust me! Why won’t you? Why do you not believe that if I call you, I will never abandon you?

So we spend our lives being only intermittently willing vessels for His use—provided, of course, that He doesn’t call us to do something out of our comfort zone. Provided that He doesn’t ask anything beyond what we think we are capable of.

Friend, God can—and will!—make you capable of anything He calls you to do. Don’t limit His work in you by hesitating or refusing when He calls you. Choose to trust Him. Be useful for Him. Let Him make of you what He wants—not merely what you will permit.

I don’t know what use He might want to make of your life today. But I do know it’s incredible. In fact, it was valuable enough to Him that He wants to assign you to do it. Will you let Him do what He wants to do? Or will you be your own master? Will I?

I pray we won’t. I pray when He asks “Who’s a good servant for me?” that instead of saying “Please find somebody else,” we’ll shoot our hands up and shout, “Me!” knowing that He will enable us. Let’s all go back to kindergarten, when we believed anything was possible. Because anything He calls us to is possible.

2 Corinthians 9:8—And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.

Independent

Today, our country celebrates gaining our independence 235 years ago. For many people, it will be a day-long celebration—grilling out, swimming, hanging out with family and friends, and watching fireworks. Actually, Americans spend quite a bit of time celebrating independence—not just our country’s independence, but our own personal independence.

It’s right and good to celebrate some steps toward independence, such as when children reach developmental milestones (like being able to open the tube of Desitin all by herself when you aren’t looking. Oh, well; at least I now know how to get waterproof substances out of bed linens). But sometimes, independence shouldn’t be celebrated. That’s because it can be a really bad idea, or even tragic.

For example, trying to do everything on one’s own as a mom, failing to ask for help when needed, and refusing it when it’s offered falls under the category of “really bad idea”. Everyone needs help at some point. Maybe even at lots of points. It’s foolish to think we can or should move through life independently of other human beings.

But it’s tragic when we think we can be independent of God. We were made to need Him, and our refusal to acknowledge that fact doesn’t change a thing. One of Satan’s favorite tactics is to prevent people from realizing how much they need God. Sometimes he might have to actively move in their lives to convince them of this; other times, he doesn’t have to do a thing, because they already think that way.

I’m not referring only to non-Christians. True, by definition, they believe they don’t need God. But we Christians can act the same way, calling God in as a consultant when life gets too difficult and running the show by ourselves the rest of the time. Have you seen the bumper sticker that reads “God is my co-pilot”? What that’s saying is that God is a consultant. An assistant. The pilot consults God when necessary and otherwise handles things on his or her own.

How would we know if we are treating God as an assistant rather than chief pilot and architect? We can know if, when something bad happens, we consult friends and the internet before we pray. It’s also a pretty good indication when we can’t remember the last time we spent time with Him, but we can remember the last time we were on Facebook. Likewise, it should tell us something when we spend more time asking for God’s blessings than we do praising Him and putting ourselves at His disposal.

We’ve all been there, my friend. We’ve all been far too independent at times. And we’ll be tempted to “forget” God again in the future. How do we prevent this from happening? We can’t necessarily prevent the temptation. But we can make it such a priority to spend time with God and ask for His perspective that eventually, it will become unnatural not to do so. We can get so used to being in His presence and checking in with Him first that doing so will become as natural as breathing. (For more on this topic, see my recent series on “Growing in God: Mommy Edition”.)

I don’t know about you, but on this Independence Day weekend, I need a little more dependence in my life, at least where my relationship with God is concerned. I don’t want to be independent of Him. Ever. Countries may decide they don’t want another country to rule over them, but I know I need God to rule over me. I would take no pride in declaring my independence of Him; instead, I take pride in the greatness of the One Who is my Master. I want to be under His rule. I hope you want the same.

Joshua 24:15—And if it seem evil unto you to serve the LORD, choose you this day whom ye will serve; whether the gods which your fathers served that were on the other side of the flood, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land ye dwell: but as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD.