How to Grow Closer to God

Growing in Prayer

Megan Breedlove February 28, 2011 No Comments

This devotion is part of a series of devotions on how to grow in your walk with God. If you have not already done so, you may find it helpful to read the introductory devotion, Growing in God: Mommy Edition.

I remember my daughter Ellie’s first prayer, at about age eighteen months. As she sat in her high chair, ready for a meal, she bowed her head and clasped her little hands. “Myna, myna, myna, myna,” she said. “Amen.”

Then there was Lindsey’s prayer, which despite being only 9 words long (if you don’t count the greeting and closing), was one of the most profound prayers I have ever heard. “Deah God,” she prayed, “I wike you. And I don’t wike the devil. In Jesus’ name we pway, amen.” I think that about says it all.

As adults, we somehow get the idea that prayer has to be more complicated. That, combined with the fact that we know how important prayer is, can lead to a lot of guilt over not praying “right”. Add the fact that as moms, we’re busy, and we don’t always have the time we’d like to have, and the guilt increases. Then, because we feel so guilty and don’t think we’re going to get it right anyway, we start avoiding prayer. It’s a vicious spiral designed by Satan, who doesn’t want us to spend time communing with our God. It’s such a sneaky tactic that we often don’t recognize it as coming from him. We think it’s just the natural result of “the way life is.”

But we’re wrong. Our natural inclination, as a new creation in Christ, is to commune with our Creator. We have a new nature, and therefore, new natural inclinations. Yes, we still have to put the old nature to death. But it’s not who we are anymore. Who we are is a child who dearly wants her Father. Anything contrary to that reflects someone we aren’t anymore.

So how do we make it happen? How do we establish the meaningful prayer life our new nature desires, when our old nature and current schedule get in the way?

First, and perhaps most important, we need to remember that God loves us madly and passionately. Despite our weakness and sin, despite our lack of merit compared to Him, He loves us. And even more than that, He’s proud of us. He’s willing to stand before the princes and rulers of this world and say, “She’s Mine! This is the one I love!” Mom, if we even begin to comprehend His love for us, if we focus on it, we’ll desire desperately to be with Him. Our souls hunger to be loved that much, and if we know that that’s how God loves us, we’ll be irresistibly drawn to Him. We won’t be able to help spending time with Him.

Second, we set other priorities aside to give time to talking with God. Whether we have an hour to talk to Him, or ten seconds, we make the time. That time can be made in the midst of driving somewhere, taking a shower, or doing laundry. It can happen when you wake up before the kids and the house is quiet, or as you sit nursing your baby. But if it’s going to happen, you have to be willing to let other things go. And you will be, if you truly believe prayer is a priority.

Third, we give up our ideas about there being only one right way to pray, as well as the mistaken belief that prayer will look the same each time. Prayer should at times include praising God, entreating Him for yourself or others, asking forgiveness of sins, and thanking Him for what He’s done, but not necessarily all of those things each time you pray. Present yourself before God as a learner, and ask the Holy Spirit to teach you to pray. You can’t guarantee a meaningful prayer time simply by structuring the minutes a certain way. But you will find rest for your soul when you connect with your Lord, heart-to-heart. That’s what God wants from you, anyway: your heart.

Martin Luther once said, “I have so much business I cannot get on without spending three hours daily in prayer.” You and I may not have three hours. But let’s take the time we do have and spend it with our Father. It’ll be worth it.

Ephesians 6:18—Pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests.

Growing in Solitude

Megan Breedlove February 21, 2011 No Comments

This devotion is part of a series of devotions on how to grow in your walk with God. If you have not already done so, you may find it helpful to read the introductory devotion, Growing in God: Mommy Edition.

I remember a time not so long ago when I used to take uninterrupted showers. I would get into the shower, get clean, get out of the shower, and get dressed, all without hearing my name called even once.

I even used to sleep through the night without any little footsteps coming toward my room, followed by a little voice saying, “Mommy? Mommy, I can’t sleep.”

As moms, we don’t get lots of time to ourselves. We’re on duty 24/7. When we’re home, we’re never out of reach of our children. And once they learn how to call us on our cell phone, even when we’re away, we’re still on duty (“Mommy? When are you coming home?”) Yet solitude is a vital spiritual discipline. In other words, it’s something we need if we’re going to grow spiritually.

We’re caught between a rock and a hard place. We need solitude, but we can’t get it. So rather than make our children suffer, we let our spiritual life suffer. After all, it’s the only thing we can do. Right?

Wrong. Even in the midst of mothering small children, there are ways to find solitude. But before we discuss those ways, let’s talk about why we need solitude in our spiritual lives.

This kind of solitude is not just so we can take a break from our parenting responsibilities. It has a higher purpose. It’s so we can be with God. For a little while, we can lay our earthly responsibilities aside and focus on our heavenly relationship. Sometimes, we might simply remain quiet before God. Other times we might pray, meditate, or even sing. The point is to be alone with Him, to hear His voice above all the other voices clamoring for our attention.

It’s a nice idea in theory. Too bad we can’t make it work.

But we can. You see, God knows that time alone with Him is vital to our spiritual development. He won’t place upon us any life calling—such as motherhood—that will turn something vital into something impossible. We may have to get creative about ways to find solitude, but God will help us, and He is infinitely creative.

After all, if a woman with 19 children can find time alone with God, then surely we can, too. Yes, that’s right—19! Susanna Wesley (mother of John and Charles) gave birth to 17 other children as well. One of her favorite ways to spend time alone with God was to sit in the midst of the busyness and bring her apron hem up over her head so that her face was covered. She trained her children to respect the fact that when Mama had her apron over her head, Mama was unavailable.

You and I could easily do something similar. We could teach our children that when Mommy is kneeling by the rocking chair, or they hear a certain praise and worship CD playing, they need to play quietly by themselves for a few minutes. Obviously, the exact details will depend on the number of children we have and on their ages. But even young children can learn to respect Mommy’s time with the Lord for a little while, if we are willing to spend the time and effort to train them to do so. And besides, what a witness it is to our children when they see Mommy putting God first!

Another possibility is to deliberately schedule times when we put on a video for them, or get them started playing a game together, or initiate some other activity for them so that they will have something to do while we are enjoying our solitude. Other options include asking our husband or a friend to care for our children while we take a mini-retreat—anywhere from half an hour to several hours. Another alternative might be to allow our children to play quietly in the room with us when we have our solitude. After all, solitude doesn’t necessarily have to mean solitude of the body; it can mean solitude of our mind and heart.

You can probably think of other ways to establish solitude, ways which might work even better for you and your family. The point is not so much how you obtain your solitude as the fact that you make getting it a priority. If you define solitude as when your body is alone, you will rarely find it. But if you broaden your definition to include solitude of heart and mind, even when your body is in the midst of the chaos of mothering, I guarantee you can find it.

It won’t be easy. Old habits of putting everything else first are hard to break. Plus, Satan doesn’t want you to find time to commune with your God. Fortunately, God does want you to have that time with Him, and He’s willing to show you ways to make it happen.

Why not ask God to help you experience solitude with Him this week? You may have to start “small”, with small blocks of time. But as you make it a point to carve out more and more time with Him, you’ll get better and better at doing so. And you’ll wonder how you ever lived without it.

Psalm 27:8—You have said, “Seek my face.” My heart says to you, “Your face, LORD, do I seek.”

Growing in God: Mommy Edition

Megan Breedlove February 14, 2011 No Comments

Being a mom is hard work. It’s the most rewarding “job” on earth, but it’s hard. I’m not just talking about functioning on two hours sleep; keeping the household running when you’re the one who’s sick; and making sure clean clothes magically appear in your kids’ dressers. I’m also talking about knowing how to discipline your third child for something your first two never did, or explaining to your children that Grandma lives in heaven now.

It’s hard. And it’s time-consuming, if you do it right. Most moms I know don’t get a break all that often (unless you count going to the grocery store by yourself as a break, and even that doesn’t happen very frequently). Mothering is about giving your life to your children. And the stakes—how your children turn out—are higher than in any other area of your life.

It’s easy to see how growing in God can get pushed to a back burner. After all, there’s just no time. Too many other things clamor for our attention, crowding out that still, small voice.

But if we allow our children to take first place and relegate God to second (or somewhere even farther down the list), we are both committing idolatry and cutting ourselves off from the Source of Life.

Idolatry? Really? It’s not like we’re worshipping a statue or something.

Maybe not, but giving anything else the place that rightfully belongs to God is idolatry. It’s saying that something or someone else is more important than God is.

None of us wants to do that. But how do we give God His rightful place? How do we grow in Him in the midst of the busy messiness of our daily lives?

The answer lies in the phrase “spiritual disciplines”. These words refer to the things that are both necessary and helpful means of drawing closer to God. Practicing the various disciplines is a way to put ourselves in a position to hear from God. It’s a way to show Him that He is of primary importance to us. It’s a way of training our minds, hearts, and spirits to seek God and walk in His ways.

Sounds great. But do they really apply to me?

That’s the beauty of the disciplines. They are for all Christians, any time, anywhere, in any walk of life. They can be practiced by kings and peasants, businesswomen and homemakers. The ways in which people practice the disciplines will differ, but that’s okay. Not every person is the same, and therefore, each person’s spiritual walk will look different. What does not differ is that no matter who you are, these disciplines will help you grow in God.

So what are the disciplines? And where do I get the time to practice them?

That’s exactly what we’ll be talking about for the next few weeks: what the disciplines are and how a mom can make them a part of her spiritual life. We’ll learn together about the ways we can grow in Christ even in the midst of all our responsibilities as moms. You see, spiritual disciplines are not just “one more thing” to add to an already overburdened schedule to stress you out just a little bit more. Instead, they are ways to actually lighten our load (we’ll see how this works). And what mom doesn’t need that?

Matthew 11:29-30—“Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”

1 Corinthians 9:24-27—Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one receives the prize? So run that you may obtain it. Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable. So I do not run aimlessly; I do not box as one beating the air. But I discipline my body and keep it under control, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified.

How to Grow Closer to God

Megan Breedlove June 1, 2008 No Comments

2 Peter 3:18 says, “But grow in grace and in the knowledge of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.” Easier said than done, right? After all, as a busy mom, who has time to invest in growing?

Most of us have been there to some extent. Maybe we’ve never said those words, but we’ve lived them. We’ve let other things crowd out the things we know are necessary for growth. We’ve regretted the fact that we don’t have more time available for cultivating a relationship with God, but we haven’t really determined to make the necessary time.

Or maybe it’s just that we don’t really know what to do, so we don’t do much of anything. How do we do it right? What exactly is it that we’re supposed to be doing, anyway?

There are four things that are absolutely vital for our spiritual growth. If we really care about growing, we will make time for these things. Let me say, however, that these are not things whereby, if we do them, we can earn brownie points with God. They are not practices which, if engaged in, will earn us stars on our heavenly chart. Nor are they things only educated people can do, or only the “truly spiritual” (whoever they are); they are things that every Christian can and must do.

First is prayer. Talking with God is absolutely vital to a relationship with Him. How can we expect to have a relationship with someone we never or rarely talk to, or someone we only talk to in order to deliver requests? Prayer is not something that has to be done “right”. If you approach prayer with a sincere heart, truly desiring to know God better, that is “right enough”. There aren’t special words to say. There is no formula to tell you what you must pray about first. So just jump in. Talk to God as you would your most intimate companion, because that is what He is. And don’t forget to listen. True prayer is not merely a monologue delivered heavenward with your eyes closed. Prayer should involve listening, too. It is a two-way conversation between you and God. You can pray anytime, anywhere, in any posture, and about anything. In fact, we are commanded to pray “on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests”. (Ephesians 6:18)) If you want to find out more about prayer, there are many excellent books out there on the subject. However, your most excellent textbook is the Bible. There, you will find examples of many different kinds of prayers. Study them. But most of all, just do it. Just pray.

Second is reading your Bible. God has spoken vividly and at length to us in His Word. Why would we neglect to read it? Again, there is no one right way to read the Bible. There are many different Bible reading plans out there. There are also many different suggestions regarding how you should read the Bible, or how much you should read at a time. I suggest that you ask God how He wants you to read it. Maybe you will read the Bible through in a year. Maybe you will concentrate on one verse each day. What matters is that you are reading and meditating on God’s Word, listening to what He has to tell you, and applying these things to your life. Make the intake of God’s Word a regular part of your spiritual life.

Third is fellowshipping with other believers. We need each other for encouragement. In fact, we are commanded to encourage one another, “and all the more as [we] see the Day (of Christ’s return) approaching.” (Hebrews 10:25) We also need the support and accountability of other believers so that we continue walking in Jesus rather than becoming “hardened by the deceitfulness of sin”. (Hebrews 3:13) Together, we can build each other up in Christ.

Fourth is to fill our minds with things that are true, noble, right, pure, lovely, and admirable. (Philippians 4:8) If we allow things into our minds that will tear us down spiritually, that will obviously impact our spiritual growth. Instead, we should fill our minds with things that encourage us in our walk with God. One such thing would be Christian literature and programming. Another would be devotional materials like the ones on this site. Another might be Christian music. Your spirit can be either polluted and weakened or encouraged and strengthened by what you put into your mind. So choose those things that will encourage you and help you in your desire to walk in holiness before the Lord.

One final word: remember that spiritual growth comes from the Lord. No matter how many times you go to church or how many chapters you read in your Bible, spiritual growth, maturity, and insight are granted only by God. Our reason for doing these things is not so that we can accomplish growth on our own. Instead, we practice spiritual disciplines because they are things that God honors with spiritual blessings. Our part is to put ourselves in a position to hear from the Lord. It is God Who will bring the increase.

If you desire to grow spiritually, lay your desire before the Lord. Ask Him what you need to do. Then, prepare to do it…and to grow.