Recently, I sat on a park bench, watching Lindsey play on the swings. The air was cool but not cold; the sun was shining its warmth upon me; and everything glistened from the raindrops left over from the night before. It was a beautiful morning.
The word that came to my mind was fresh. That’s how the morning felt—fresh, clean, and new.
I also have a newborn son. Timothy was born three weeks ago. Although it’s already hard to remember what life was like without him, we are still just getting to know him. Each day, we get more clues to his delightful personality. But as far as we know now, he could grow up to be anything. He could express his personality in a number of unique, charming ways.
Anything seems possible.
Sometimes, it’s easy to see possibilities. We look at the weather or a situation or a person and see only potential. Other times, we see only the negative. When Lindsey and I arrived at the park, I could have thought to myself (or even said out loud), What a wet, nasty day. Instead of a precious little boy, I could look at my son and see only the myriad diaper changes and the amount of time I’m “tied down” feeding him. Same weather—same child—but different attitude.
What makes the difference? Perspective.
With most things in life, especially the smaller things, the difference between a positive or negative attitude is simply a matter of perspective. We can look at a person or situation and focus on what we perceive to be the negative aspects, or we can focus on the positive. The rain left on the ground at the park? It could have been negative—something that messed up the place we wanted to play—or, as I took it, positive, making everything glisten.
Unfortunately, I don’t always choose a positive perspective in the face of things I don’t like. I sometimes focus so intently on the negative qualities of my situation that the positive ones just don’t seem to matter much. But I want to do better. Why? Three reasons.
First, it’s what God wants. We’re mistaken if we think He’s pleased when we decide to see a glass as half-empty when all it would take to see it as half-full is a shift in perspective. I’m not suggesting we all become Pollyannas and deny our negative feelings about something. But I am recommending that we take those negative feelings to God and ask Him to help us deal with them.
Second, when I have a positive perspective in a situation, it indicates that I know God can and will see me through. No situation or person I encounter is too big for God to be able to use in a positive way in my life. Often, it would be fairly easy to find something positive to concentrate on if we were just willing to look—especially if we remember that God is present with us in our circumstances and will take care of us.
Third, a negative perspective rarely makes me happy. I get far more peace from focusing on the good aspects of a situation than on the bad and from remembering to seek God in my situation rather than just grumble. So why do I spend my time complaining about something or someone? Good question.
Perhaps there is a situation or person in your life right now that you need to find something positive in. Again, I’m not suggesting that you deny the negative, but rather that you find something positive in the situation and think about that rather than about the part you don’t like (which may very well be legitimate). If you can’t find anything good to consider, ask God to help you.
Your strong-willed child who has difficulty obeying you the first time you give instructions? Perhaps the positive is that you know his strong will is going to help him stand against peer pressure. You may still have to discipline his behavior, but now at least you have found something positive to partially relieve your emotions and make things a little bit easier on yourself.
Your husband who isn’t as emotional with you as you would like him to be? Perhaps you could see him as calm and steady, qualities that are of extreme value in the storms of life. You may still decide to respectfully discuss the issue with him, but at least you won’t be doing it from a completely negative mindset.
On what situation or person in your life do you need a fresh perspective? What difference might it make if you could begin to acknowledge and think about the positive? Will you do it?
Proverbs 15:15—All the days of the afflicted are evil, but the cheerful of heart has a continual feast.