How to Grow Closer to God

In Between

Megan Breedlove February 24, 2014 No Comments

I love the Olympics. To me, there’s something really special about the world putting aside its differences for two weeks and each country sending its best athletes to compete. If you’re an athlete, there’s really no higher honor than having an Olympic medal—especially the gold—draped around your neck.

Athletes from all over the world work, prepare, and strive for three years and fifty weeks before converging on one location where everything they’ve done will come down to a few moments in time as they compete for the coveted gold medal and the title of Olympic Champion.

These athletes don’t wake up the week before the Olympic Games and decide to compete. They have spent the better part of their lives preparing for a few-minute shot at greatness. Take, for example, ladies’ figure skating and the long program. Years of preparation leads up to a mere four minutes on the ice. Years of preparation for a four-minute chance at glory.

I imagine there are times when even the best athletes wake up and think, “I don’t want to go to practice. I’d rather stay in bed.” Likewise, there must be times when they don’t feel well, or have other things they’d rather be doing. Yet the successful athlete learns to make training a priority. Those who don’t, don’t win the Olympics.

You and I would do equally well to make our spiritual training a priority—to be willing to put in the time training in anticipation of those times we’re going to be tested. In those times, we’ll have to rely on our training. But if we haven’t been training, we’ll have very little to rely on.

The “big” moments in our spiritual lives may not come often. Those moments or periods of time when we feel stretched to the limit may not happen every day. But we’d be wise to prepare for them. Otherwise, the times of testing or temptation will come, and we won’t be ready.

Have you ever thought about what you want to happen when the rubber meets the road? In other words, when your faith is tested, or you’re tempted, what do you want to happen? Do you want to wind up standing on the podium with a medal around your neck, or do you want to be disqualified in the first round?

Of course you don’t want to be disqualified, and neither do I. But failure to train properly may very well mean that when the hard times come, we fail. Yes, we can always fall back on God. He will never leave us nor forsake us. But it’s taking Him for granted in the worst way to ignore Him for four years and then expect Him to be there for us for our four-minute effort and to help us win.

What are you doing now to prepare for the trials that will come your way? Jesus guaranteed that we would face trials—every one of us. What are you doing now to be ready then?

1 Corinthians 9:27—But I discipline my body and keep it under control, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified.

Fame

Megan Breedlove November 25, 2013 No Comments

A few days ago, I returned from a trip to California. I had gone there to meet the team at my publishing house and to discuss some publicity strategies for my upcoming book (Chaotic Joy; coming April 1, 2014). The most fun aspect of the trip was getting to meet the eople I had formerly known only by name or through email. The second best aspect—which was right up there with the first—was that I had gone by myself. In other words, no children.

An all-expenses paid trip to California by myself, no childcare duties involved. Ahhhhhh. I started looking forward to it the minute I heard about it. However, while I very much enjoyed the time alone, I also wished the team could have met my children. My children are great people, and I love showing them off, just like you do yours. Plus,it’s because of my children that I write what I do: books for moms. Therefore, people who know my children will get a deeper glimpse into who I am and what’s behind my writing.

I found out, though, that even though most of the staff there had never met my children (my editor had met Timmy once when he was 3 months old, because I had brought him to a writing conference she and I both attended), Timmy’s reputation had preceded him. I’m friends with some of the staff on Facebook, and I frequently post about Timmy on my personal page. So Timmy’s exploits were nothing new.

“How’s Timmy doing?” several people asked, knowing he was probably up to or into something.

But active toddler boys aren’t the only ones whose reputation precedes them. Sometimes ours precedes us, as well.

You and I may become well-known even to people who have never met us in person. People may have heard of us (whether for good or for ill) and be well aware of what kind of person we are—even if they’ve never seen us face-to-face. Our fame may go before us, causing them to expect us to be a certain type of person. Usually, this is no problem.

But we need to make sure we’re well-known for good things, not bad. We want to be known as the person who’s always gracious, not the person with the unpredictable temper. It’s much better to be known as the person with a kind word for everyone, as opposed to the person who’s so negative and critical that no one wants to be around her.

Friend, what’s your reputation?Is it something you’re glad to be known for?

If not, it’s never too late to begin building a new reputation. With God’s help, you can stop gossiping, or being harsh or negative, or being lazy. You can choose the reputation you want and work to make that happen. And the best part is that you don’t have to work alone. God will help you, because He wants you to be known for positive qualities even more than you do. He wants you to reflect well on Him and to bring glory to His name, which is hard to do if you’re known for less-than-positive traits.

So if you’re known for positive, God-honoring things, rejoice and give thanks to Him that He has enabled this to be so. If you’re known for the opposite, lay those things before Him and ask for His help to become known for things He would want you known for.

Ask Him to help you reflect the character of His Son, and to become known for that character. You can rest assured He will answer that prayer with a yes.

Proverbs 22:1—A good name is more desirable than great riches; to be esteemed is better than silver or gold.

Calvin Who?

Megan Breedlove November 18, 2013 No Comments

Teaching children is always an adventure. You never know what they’re going to say next.

The other day, I was teaching Ellie history (she is homeschooled). She had read a particular section of the chapter, and I was quizzing her about it. We came to one question where the answer was supposed to be Calvin Coolidge.

Oh, I know!” she said. “That’s Calvin, uh, Calvin What’s-his-name…I know! Calvin Klein!”

I couldn’t help but laugh. Her error was easily corrected, as I explained who both men were and that she should have said Calvin Coolidge.

The fact that she got the two confused rather amused me. I found it funny that, when pressed to think of “Calvin’s” last name, she came up with the name of a clothing manufacturer instead of the name of our former President.

Getting an answer wrong in history class can be funny. What’s not so humorous, however—not at all, actually—is when we don’t know the right answer to other, more important questions.

As Christians, we are to live our lives in accordance with God’s standards. That means we have to know what those standards are. We need to be able to answer questions we’ll all encounter, such as Is it okay to be snarky to someone who made me mad? (No.) Is it okay to be kind only to the people I really like? (No.) Did God really mean that I need to be faithful to my marriage vows and loving to my husband and children? (Yes.)

So how are we going to know what the right answer is in a particular situation? It’s dangerous just to wait until the situation occurs and then go with whatever our emotions tell us is right. Emotions can be greatly deceptive, and we run a risk—sometimes a huge one—when we allow them to be the arbiters of what we should do.

Instead, we need to ingrain God’s answers to these questions into our minds, so that when the situation arises, we aren’t at a loss as to what’s the right thing to do. And the best way to know what God says in regards to the decisions we must make is to look at His revealed Word, the Bible.

In the Bible, God lays out for us all the principles we need in order to know what kind of conduct is right and pleases Him. He gives us all the answers to our moral questions. Do the kind thing. Do the loving thing. Put others first. Granted, He doesn’t always tell us exactly how to apply these principles in every situation we face. But He does give us these answers. When someone snaps at us, we already know what the answer is: we’re supposed to respond lovingly. All that’s left to do is ask God for the application. Exactly what does being loving look like in this situation?

Or when someone tempts us to sin, we know we’re supposed to flee temptation. We don’t have to ask whether or not that’s the right answer; we already know that it is. All we have to do is ask God what fleeing looking like in our particular situation.

Do you know what God says to us in His Word? Are you familiar with the principles He’s laid out in the Bible? Do you already know the answers He’s provided you even before you ask?

If not, you need to spend more time studying the pages of Scripture. God has provided answers to some of our most commonly asked questions, and you should want to know what those answers are. He’s provided solutions to some of our most frequent or irritating problems, and if you know what He’s said, you’ll be a lot better able to deal with them.

Yes, you might still have to ask Him for some specifics in how to apply His answers, but make sure you at least know what those answers are. By giving them to you, He’s given you a leg up on every situation you will ever face.

Take advantage of that.

Psalm 119:97— Oh, how I love your law! I meditate on it all day long. (NIV)

No Room for Clothes

Megan Breedlove November 4, 2013 No Comments

This past weekend, our family took a trip to see my in-laws (“Grandma and Pampa”, as the kids call them). Friday was our day to pack and prepare for the trip, and when we do, even the kids help by packing some of their own things. I was working on one particular task when Jessica came into the room pulling her suitcase, which appeared stuffed to the gills.

“I finished packing my stuffed animals,” she said. “But now I don’t have any room for my clothes.”

“You have to pack your clothes first,” I said.

“Oh,” she said, turning to eye the suitcase as if trying to figure out how she could make both clothes and stuffed animals fit in there.

I didn’t blame her for wanting to fill her suitcase full of twenty or thirty of her favorite stuffed friends. As a child, I loved my stuffed animals too. The only problem was that stuffed animals can’t be allowed to take the place of clothes to wear.

You and I sometimes find ourselves in a situation similar to Jessica’s. We’ve filled our lives with good things, maybe even very good things, and that’s fine. But what’s not fine is when we allow the good things to crowd out the truly essential things.

We find time for soccer practice and Facebook, but we don’t find time for a daily time spent with God. Or we have time for our friends or favorite leisure pursuits, but we don’t have time to go to church on a regular basis.

In other words, we prioritize earthly things over cultivating our relationship with God.

Those earthly things may seem more urgent, but they usually aren’t. What could be more urgent than our connection to God? Yet we put virtually everything else in front of it, and things like a daily quiet time get pushed to the side, if they even happen at all.

But if we’re too busy to have a regular time with your Creator, we’re just plain too busy. When our plate is overloaded, something may have to give. But that something shouldn’t be our intimacy with God.

True, we may have to be creative in scheduling time to develop our relationship with Him. There will be days when we have to take time with Him where we can get it. But unless you and I make time spent with Him a priority, it’s probably not going to happen.

Moms, let’s get our priorities straight. Let’s not stuff our lives so full of the non-essentials or seeming essentials that we have no time left for what is truly essential. Let’s get first things first—and then, in the time that’s left over, we can schedule all those other things.

Let’s not let other things, even good ones, stuff our suitcases so full that there’s no room left for what we really need.

Psalm 73:25—Whom have I in heaven but you? And earth has nothing I desire besides you. (NIV)

Finished

Megan Breedlove September 23, 2013 No Comments

Two days ago, I finished the manuscript for my third book, Chaotic Joy: Finding Abundance in the Messiness of Motherhood. I still need to change some things before sending it to my editor, and then, of course, I’ll need to make any revisions she suggests. But the lion’s share of the work is done.

I’m relieved. Yes, I enjoyed writing the book, but I’m also glad to be finished. Now I can fine-tune the details and turn it into the best book it can be, one that God will hopefully use to touch the lives of thousands of women and lead them into a closer relationship to Himself.

And the thought occurs to me, as I sit here poised to go through the rest of the editing and finishing process with my book, that God has written a book too—and His was perfect just the way it was.

Now let me be clear about one thing: I am not comparing the worth of my book in any way to the worth of God’s Book—the Bible. But through calling me to author three books, God has taught me more about Himself as the ultimate Author. It’s this that I want to share with you.

You see, God wants the same thing I want for my book. He wants thousands (well, He wants billions) of people to read it, and He wants their lives to be changed. And to that end, He crafted the best Book He could, a Book so good it’s perfect. He did this by inspiring mere human beings to write the words that God knew would change lives, all over the world even two thousand years after they were written.

Some of you will eventually buy my book when it is released. That’s great. I presume you’ll read it, and I hope you’ll enjoy it and find it meaningful. But what’s even better is for you to own a copy of God’s Word and to read it—and not just once, but regularly.

His Book isn’t meant to be purchased and read once, then to sit on a shelf untouched. It’s designed to be read regularly and often. Even though you’ve read it before, it’s possible for you to find something new each time you read it, because the Holy Spirit can make it new in your heart.

Don’t think you have time to read it? Even the busiest mom has five minutes—or even two minutes—per day which she can spend reading the Book.

Don’t think it has anything new to teach you? I guarantee you’ll be surprised.

Doesn’t seem interesting? Then you haven’t read it for what it really is, a way to know God better. Theologian John R. W. Stott has said that “the Bible is God preaching”. In other words, when you read the words someone really wants to say, you’ll get to know that person better. It’s the same way with God. Read His words, and get to know Him better.

Once you get to know Him better, you’ll love Him more and more, because you’ll realize to a greater and greater extent how truly lovable He is. And once you come to know and love Him more—well, that’s when things really take off, spiritually speaking. How could you refuse benefits like that?

If you only read my book once, fine. But if you only read God’s Book once, you’re making a huge mistake.

2 Peter 1:21—For no prophecy was ever produced by the will of man, but men spoke from God as they were carried along by the Holy Spirit. (ESV)

2 Timothy 3:16—All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness: That the [wo]man of God may be perfect, thoroughly furnished unto all good works. (KJV)

In Style

Megan Breedlove July 29, 2013 2 Comments

Yesterday, my best friend Lori and I went clothes shopping. The trip was primarily for me, as I have been working on losing weight and need clothes that fit my new size. Lori, as a former model, is not only beautiful, but also very knowledgeable about fashion and what clothes look good on people. So she went with me to our favorite store to help me pick out clothes that would flatter my figure.

I loved having her with me, not just because she’s my best friend, but also for her expertise in this area. With her there, I felt confident that I would come home with clothes that fit my budget (she’s budget-conscious like I am) as well as fit my body and made me look and feel good. Since Lori is also honest, I knew that if I picked out something that wouldn’t really look good on me, she would tactfully say so.

In other words, Lori was my mentor yesterday in an area of life that is important to me. But there’s another area of my life that’s far more important than clothes, and that is the area of spiritual things. Because spiritual things are so important, I want a mentor in that area too, even more than I do when picking out what to wear.

Most of us would benefit from having a spiritual mentor in our lives. A spiritual mentor is someone who is farther along in the faith than we are and can help guide us along the path. This woman will be more mature than we are and will know us (or come to know us) well. She will speak truth into our lives and rebuke us when necessary; she will walk with us through our struggles and share some of her struggles as well. She’ll be that person we can lean on when we need godly guidance, comfort, wisdom, or encouragement. She’ll check on us when it’s been awhile since we’ve talked, yet she’ll also be sure we maintain regular contact with each other. In short, she will truly care about us and be willing to invest her life in us and in our spiritual growth.

Does it sound wonderful to have a woman like that involved in our lives? It truly is. I have been blessed with more than one mentor with whom I can be completely honest and completely myself, and receive from her nothing but understanding, support, and encouragement.

It may be that you also have such a mentor. If you do, thank God for your mentor, and then thank her for all she does for you. If you don’t, you might consider one of two possibilities. The first possibility is that God might want you to mentor someone else. Maybe He wants you to come alongside somebody in the way I’ve described and help her know Him better. Or, the second possibility, maybe He wants you to pray, asking Him to send a mentor into your life.

It’s possible that right now, this is a season for you to walk on your own. But it’s also possible that God has a wonderful woman in mind to mentor you like we’ve talked about. If you need any further ideas on how to look for a mentor or whether you should ask someone, or if you have any questions, please don’t hesitate to contact me. It’s what I’m here for. I’d love to encourage you.

Titus 2:3-4—Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children. (ESV)

100 Monkeys

Megan Breedlove June 24, 2013 2 Comments

My daughter Lindsey loves monkeys. I don’t remember when she first fell in love with them, but it’s been going on for awhile now. Since she was first smitten, she has begun building a collection of stuffed monkeys: big ones, little ones, brown ones, blue ones, pink ones, realistic monkeys, cartoonish monkeys—well, you get the idea.

Lindsey’s goal is to have one hundred monkeys (she has about 65 as of this writing). Actually, her goal is to have a million monkeys, but she has settled on the number 100 as an intermediate goal. She looks for monkeys everywhere we go, especially if she knows I’m likely to buy her something at our destination.

The other day, we were passing a garage sale on our way home from running an errand, and Lindsey’s eagle eye (monkey eye?) spotted a large stuffed monkey in a box. “Oooo, I want that monkey!” she said eagerly. She didn’t get the monkey that day (it was huge), but I know she won’t give up hope that she’ll get more in the future. She won’t stop looking, either, or hoping to receive monkeys for her birthday or for Christmas. She’ll do everything she can to reach her goal.

You and I would do well to be similarly dedicated to our goals, especially our spiritual goals. The problem is that most of us don’t even have spiritual goals, except in some vague sense. If we do, we usually don’t have much of a plan for reaching them, and if we have a plan, we usually don’t stick to it.

If we don’t have a goal in the first place, that’s a huge problem. We ought to at least know where we want to go spiritually, or we’ll be going in the wrong direction. Failing to have spiritual goals is about as good as having the wrong goal. The Bible teaches us over and over that God’s goal for us is to be holy. To be like Jesus. That needs to be our spiritual goal, first and foremost.

Okay, so we have a goal. Do we have a plan for getting there? Most of us have a rather vague plan that includes going to church and maybe reading our Bible or praying occasionally. So we go to church when it’s convenient, and we pray and read our Bibles when it’s convenient, which is to say almost never. We need to have a better plan than that, and our plan must include regular church attendance, prayer, Bible study, and service, to name a few. Exactly what this plan will look like will differ from person to person, because God made us all different, and our circumstances are all different. But each person’s plan should include at least these things.

Don’t know what your plan should include? Ask God. Tell Him you want to be more like His Son, and you know you’ll need to do certain things to put yourself in a position for Him to work in you, teach you, and conform you to Jesus’ image. Ask Him what those things should be—what you should do, when you should do it, and how often you should do it.

And then be willing to work at it! It does little good to have a plan if you aren’t going to act on it. Even the best plans in the world will fail if you don’t do them. Now, lest you think I don’t realize how hard it is to take consistent action when you are in the midst of parenting, let me remind you that I have five children! I know it’s hard, and I admit that I don’t always get it right either. I fail to do things I know I should do, or I give priority to things that should take a back seat to spiritual things. But God will never ask you to do something that He won’t help you do. So once you know what His plan is for you, ask Him to help you accomplish it. Be willing to set aside your priorities for His. Work at it even when it’s hard.

True, even with all the hard work in the world, you can’t produce godliness in yourself. Godliness is produced in you by God, but it’s a whole lot more likely to happen when you show Him you’re interested.

Lindsey is willing to work hard to reach her goal. Her goal is collecting monkeys.

Are you willing to work hard toward the goal of knowing and serving the Lord your God?

1 Kings 8:61—Therefore devote yourselves completely to the Lord our God, walking in his statutes and keeping his commandments, as at this day.